Your piece brings tears to my eyes.

Since mid December I have literally lost my appetite. What happened? 4 unpaid traffic tickets - one for going 110 rather than 90 km on a Jerusalem highway - led to a stiff $ 1500 fine and then the seizure of my two bank accounts.

So after a year of Corona lockdowns - the idea of running my household with 2 sons in it aged 26 and 17 - without access to cash for the foreseable future - felt like a true nightmare dark cloud descending on my mind.

why tears to my eye? Because life without genuine love in it ain't worth living. So the first thought that comes to mind is that someone important in your life was NOT there for you emotionally.

as a single mother at 57 and with 4 sons, 2 of whom have struggled with the fall-out from their self-absorbed father who can't connect with them in love - I have the challenging task to get other men here in Jerusalem to explain to him that the only one who can make his sons feel that they have value and that they matter is us their parents.

Ideally that validation could come from their friends also. One son (26) is diagnosed with Asperger and has thank G-d now chosen to come home.

For you I wish and pray that you find water in the desert e.g. a source of genuine happiness, pleasure and satisfaction. The thing that makes you skip along on the sidewalk and whistle in the shower.

You are very great for writing about the depression in such an open and honest way. The conclusion here on Israel among people "in the know" e.g sages close to G-d is that our time is the most difficult time in history spiritually as the forces of evil have never been greater than now. Even more difficult than the time of the Holocaust.

However it is meant to come to an end - sooner hopefully rather than later - and that in the meantime we all look out for one another. You are a precious man and your family is truly blessed to have you. Keep on writing and keep on asking the "Hidden Silent Witness Within" - your soul which is Divine - to show you the path to your genuine fulfillment and joy.

Blessings from Jerusalem - Israel

Mrs. Hannah Porat

Author of "The end of war forever: one umiversal moral law for all people - from G-d" - Amazon eKindle - April 2021